End-of-year bonus season, just like the holiday season, arrives like a Hallmark movie, only this one is written by HR. Supposed to be magical. Mostly just paper plates and quiet resentment.
This place used to go all out with a pizza party, which already says everything. One slice per person, bring your own drink, and try not to act too entitled while chewing through corporate gratitude. This year, management decided to “make it more personal” now that the team is down to four people doing the work of fifteen. Fewer humans, same delusion.
So the boss shows up at the desk with that tight smile that means a speech is coming. Talks about value. Talks about appreciation. Talks about how much this contribution means to the company. Then hands over a card like it holds stock options. Inside is a five-dollar Dunkin gift card. Five. Dollars. The price of one drink, if no one breathes near the syrup pumps. But do not worry, it is extra meaningful because it “came out of her pocket.”
Meanwhile, there is an actual discretionary fund specifically for employee appreciation that just quietly resets if no one uses it. The company could have covered the coffee, the pizza, the bare minimum performance of gratitude. Instead, the choice is that workers can have crumbs and management can have a story about how much they care.